Thoughts

Sometimes we compare certain events to past events and we can say on a superficial level that event a was better than event b due to these particular factors. If I compared the beginning of this year to the beginning of last year I could say similar things. 2013 started out with its ups and then some downs. The downs took more of a toll than the ups, but that can be expected positivity is easier to swallow than negativity. Negativity is easier to wallow in and get sucked into.
This year I came in with a plan and I worked hard to get the things I needed to get those things done. Obstructions came my way and they were overcome only for bigger obstructions to appear, but that's how it works right? I reached a huge obstacle that not only shook the foundation I was standing on but created enough fissures for me to fall through the ground and land extremely hard. There were moments I wanted to give up but there was always someone there to talk some sense into me and I'm grateful for that. Not many people have that support system. I am a believer that difficulties are a test to see how you will stick with something and sometimes it will seem hopeless but if it's something that you are passionate about you will stick with it and reap the rewards. I spoke with an artist during the opening ceremony of an exhibition at my alma mater and he told me that everybody has a story of how they succeeded or failed in whatever they attempted to accomplish.
I grew up in an abusive household, both physically and verbally. Many times I was verbally berated to the point where I began to question my own self worth. It's difficult to understand these things as a child and when you are young and it happens often enough you begin to accept it as your reality. You don't question certain things without an outside perspective present to give you reason to question. It wasn't until I spent time away and started being productive and receiving praises for things I did right instead of ridicule for things I did wrong did I begin to slightly question things. Even in that instance I wasn't fully able to understand the full spectrum.
The last paragraph was not an attempt to get sympathy. There are many others who suffer similar fates and much worse. Who don't get a glimpse of the positive and in a way are forced to focus on the negative. Sometimes it makes it harder to move forward when you're looking back too often. The point is that as individuals we have to learn how to let go and focus on moving forward. For some individuals forward momentum is easier to gain due to a good support system, for others rationalization becomes a crutch. Our fears sometimes shroud our better judgements and we begin to make certain things fact without them actually being fact.
We all have obstacles to overcome, you can't really understand someone else's without knowing their story and even then you may not be able to understand.